Toys in the Cereal Box

yesterday’s panic attack

so i’ve been having these massive headaches in the middle of the afternoon at work and it has really been stressing me out.  i’ve spent the last week or so trying to figure out what could be wrong with me:  do i hate my job? do i hate the guy who sits next to me? am i pmsing? i thought as critically as i possibly could and was coming up empty.

yesterday, i had a business lunch with my boss and the other member of my team offsite at our usual spot and i had a vodka tonic, as one cocktail does nothing to impact my net productivity at the office.  clearly my boss agrees with my cocktail theory as he paid for the lunch…within roughly 30 minutes of imbibing the drink, i had another massive headache.  by the time i returned to the office i realized that all of my headaches had come after one of these off-site “meetings” and i began to panic.  could i possibly be allergic to vodka? if so, what would i do? what would this mean for my life? my social life largely revolves around my friends, food, wine, dance parties, and grey goose.  i have been drinking vodka since i was sixteen and i just cannot imagine goose not being a part of my life.  i started to panic and decided i needed to test out my allergy theory, so i went back to the bar for another “meeting” after work, this time i had vodka but no tonic and i was a-ok.

luckily it looks like i’m just allergic to tonic but i should be a-ok with vodka going forward.  thank god.

delightful sunday

 If your Sunday does not include a hangover for some reason, I would strongly recommend while it is still nice out, taking a walk over to the west side before all the Hamptons folks return to repopulate the city with their eating disorders, coke habits, and far too expensive preppy clothing.  The west side is where I spent most of Sunday solo enjoying the people watching which mostly included cute dogs, kids taking their bicycles for a first spin, and couples who clearly live uptown and consider running along the west side highway to be their foray into downtown life.

I made my first visit to the High Line and it was pretty sweet.  The views were great, there are places to drink booze, watch people have sex at the standard, and even spots for the little ones to play.  My only issue with the High Line is the issue I have with every other really fun/interesting/scenic spot in Manhattan, it was interminably crowded.  From savvy suburbanites to high-heeled models, to the most adorable multi-cultural, bi-racial families one could ever imagine (genetic diversity is where its at folks)- the place was packed.  Crowds aside, I would still recommend a trip up there as it really was pretty great.  I’d imagine the view at sunset was even better but by the time the sun was setting I was pretty ravenous and after a brief stop at the gym (precipitated mostly by a need to pee), I headed to Whole Foods for another Sunday NYC tradition:  grocery shopping.  Also, absurdly crowded and I made the rookie mistake of hitting up the grocery store after a day where I only had a few cookies and a soy latte, so by the time I got to Whole Foods every food option seemed like a great idea.

I also deftly avoided, barely, a prominent partner at my firm as I didn’t think it appropriate to approach him while he is at the butcher and while yours truly was still a sweaty, disgusting mess donning a Yankees hat, pearls, and the same yoga pants I had on the day before.  Walking around lower Manhattan in the same clothes two days in a row and I cannot figure out I haven’t secured a date all summer…

because it is the weekend…and time to be less serious

and if you haven’t read this by now you either don’t work in finance or live under a rock or some combination of the two…

The Ex-Banker Living on Alcohol, Hook-ups, and Unemployment…

ummm wow.  now here is the thing, i would love to be all self-righteous and judgmental and rant about how inappropriate this girl’s behavior is, but at the end of the day i must own up to the fact that if i wanted to behave in this fashion, considering my posse of guy and girl friends, it probably wouldn’t actually be all that challenging.  i’ve been to the majority of those venues, i’ve dropped a drunk text or two (or ten), i drink for free frequently, and i’ve definitely eaten for free at the cost of some other girl’s date who wasn’t attractive at all.  there is clearly some serious misbehavior in this piece that i wouldn’t touch, but again if i wanted to it just wouldn’t be that difficult.  furthermore, as much as i am for personal responsibility, there is a part of me that feels that nyc should take some responsibility for her behavior.  at the end of the day we live in a city that doesn’t just enable, but it encourages this kind of batshit crazy routine.  this place is all about being out of control as often as possible regardless of the amount or lack of money in your bank account so god bless her for making the most out of her limited resources.

my only real criticisms are as follows: if you’re partying that much, you should probably do a better job of defining that line in the sand between acceptable and blackout at some point (you’re not in college anymore kid) and you should have developed a system for hangover management by now.  there should be a game plan for hangover prevention and a system of post-binge drinking practices in place so you can sort of function like a normal person and find a fucking job.

good luck darling.

Two djs in one week…

On my walk home from the gym with laptop and salad in tow, yes it is a friday night and I am that cool. I noticed a mob of people and press in front of an apartment building on lafayette street just a few blocks from my own place. There were cameras everywhere and annoying people, press, ect. I was none too pleased, until I asked someone what was going on that was blocking my way home and keeping me from scarfing down my salad (I am secretly a fat chick as you will recall), and was told that the infamous DJ AM had died. The circumstances surrounding his death are currently unclear, but according to People Magazine, its true: http://www.people.com/people/article/0„20301276,00.html NYC has officially lost two DJs in one week, with charitable DJ Josh Link (he just spun at a Pink Agenda fundraiser) having been wiped out on his Vespa earlier this week. Its a little bit creepy…

service to the community???

so i got up extra early this morning and left my downtown apartment in the rain donning chuck taylors and denim, to head to a united way funded daycare center in harlem to volunteer with some folks from my company.  not only was the crew primarily white, but even absent that fact, we couldn’t have been any more out of place.  it was hilarious and embarrassing all at the same time.  here come the downtown bankers, “dressed down” carrying longchamps bags and wearing gucci horse bit loafers, to harlem to come play with a few poor kids for a couple of hours.  it was so painfully contrived and moderately shameful.  i cannot decide if these kinds of activities actually reinforce how fortunate we are and how important it is to give back, or if they just make people feel better about themselves for a few hours and then forget about kids who live in the projects and whose chances of achieving even modest success have already been severely hampered by the circumstances into which they were born. 

 i find it both frustrating and disgusting that so many kids start life out already screwed.  i struggle with the fact that they will never know the kind of opportunities that even as a less than priviliged child, i always had afforded to me.  if nothing else, a sense of safety and security in my home community.  i certainly don’t feel any better about myself and the only positive feeling i was left with was a deep sense of respect i have for the teachers and other direct care providers who serve as surrogate parents for these children. 

i left confident of one thing, i am certain that the educators are underappreciated and underpaid and even though i’m not sure it has the greatest possible impact, i will continue to give a percentage of my salary to the united way, because at the end of the day, doing something is better than doing nothing at all.   

and god knows, i’m not about to become one of those teachers as three hours with the kids was enough to make me so tired i’m nearly comatose so for now, they will have to settle for my cash.

 Now is the time to finally meet our moral obligation to provide every child a world class education, because it will take nothing less to compete in the global economy.-President Barack Obama, DNC August 28 2008

How are we going to do that?

Political Legend

“We know that the future will outlast all of us, but I believe all of us will live on in the future we make.”  -Edward Moore Kennedy

Since everyone else blogged about this yesterday, I’m going to blog about it today.  I do whatever I can to be special.

My first meeting with the senior senator from Massachusetts was actually on my own turf in the suburbs of New York at an event where he was honored with an award in the name of another political legend, FDR.  As promised, the senator was larger than life and had that accent you only get from the bay state, and that red nose you only get from drinking too much on one too many occasions.  That day we actually bonded over the wine served at the event.  I was sixteen at the time, but I was served and I remember thinking it was quite delightful. I was simply beside myself, a day off from school, strawberry shortcake, and wine with Senator Kennedy.  I could not yet drive, but I considered myself to be a pretty big deal, and after my over-eager father arrived to pick me up (complete with windbreaker and fanny pack, yes it was a formal affair) the senator was more than pleased to take a photo with him.  That photo sits on my father’s dresser today.

A few years later, after spending time serving at the Institute of Politics he helped establish at the Kennedy School of Government, and of equal importance making out with boys at the final club he belonged to while at Harvard, I managed to weasel my way into a summer internship with his economic development office on capitol hill.  I had never taken an economics course and I am not from MA, but I knew that was where I belonged.  I quickly realized it would be a fun and interesting summer, as my first day at work started with my boss arriving late, with busted glasses and a black eye, mumbling something about a fight in a bar in Adams Morgan.  I didn’t yet know the guy, and again, I still could not legally drink, but that got me pretty stoked for my summer in DC.  I learned how to get around quickly because even when you’re a big deal senator, when the other party is in power your offices get spread out across the three buildings that compose the capital office complex, so that your life is made as hellish and difficult as possible. When I worked there the senator had a physical inbox called “the bag” aka documents that were of timely and oftentimes sensitive nature that went into his briefcase.  Items for “the bag” were only given to people who were deemed responsible and could move quickly; luckily I had long legs and at least the appearance of trustworthiness.  I can remember working on an economic policy brief then being told it needed to be in the “bag” NOW.  I don’t think I’ve ever moved so quickly in a pencil skirt and high heels, and by the time I returned to my desk, I watched him on C-SPAN presenting the brief on the senate floor.  That was when I learned what “timely” actually meant. 

I will always find something very appealing about those who are born into great fortune, yet make it their responsibility to serve the less fortunate.  Little was expected of Teddy and his life may have been marred by reckless behavior, but he clearly believed in doing good and having a good time so obviously a man worthy of my respect.   I consider it a great fortune to have had the opportunity to play a the tiniest role in supporting his many efforts to help others over the years.

http://www.nytimes.com/2009/08/27/us/politics/27kennedy.html